Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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