just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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