How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
