Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
