i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize