Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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