Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
