That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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