There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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