Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
