Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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