dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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