whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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