Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize