are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
