that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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