I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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