I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
