We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
