Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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