"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i would one night stand the shit outta him
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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