sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
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