I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Randomize
