The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
