okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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