I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
