If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
that is very illegal...i love you.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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