let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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