Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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