Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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