you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
