I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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