only if we run a train.
done.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I party with great urgency now.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
