Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
