Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
