So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
