i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
