you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
