There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
