it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
