just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize