sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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