I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
