Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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