Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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