omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
her vagine was all disorganized.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
So much rum. So many feels.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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