I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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