Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
