found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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