No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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