Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Randomize
