Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
